1.29.2009

Never Knew I had Relatives in Nigeria...

This is an email I received in my spam folder today. I don't get much spam, so I usually go through each one and read them. They are often quite funny and I couldn't help but post this one...do these people think I am this dumb?!? Please note, I have highlighted grammatical errors and interesting tidbits purely for my own pleasure...


OFFICE OF THE SENATE HOUSE
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
COMMITTEE ON FOREIGN PAYMENT
(RESOLUTION PANEL ON CONTRACT PAYMENT)
44 GARRICK LANE F.C.T ABUJA
Our Ref: FGN /SNT/STB
Your Ref.


This is to officially inform you that we have verified your contract/inheritance file and found out that why you have not received your payment is because you have not fulfilled the obligations given to you in respect of your contract/inheritance payment. Secondly, we have been informed that you are still dealing with the none officials in the bank all your attempts to secure the release of the fund to you. We wish to advise you that such an illegal act {Gasp! This is illegal?!} like this have to stop if you wish to receive your payment since we have decided to bring a solution to your problem. Right now we have arranged your payment through our swift card payment centre Asia pacific, that's latest instruction from the new president,Alhaji Umar Musa Yaradua federal republic of Nigeria.This card centre will send you an atm card which you will use to withdraw your money in any atm machine in any part of the world, but the maximum is ten thousand, five hundred United States dollars per day. So if you like to receive your funds in this way please let us know by contacting the atm  payment department director and also send the following information as listed below.


1. Full name {As far as I understand it, I'm going to receive an inheritance, and they don't know what my name is?!}
2. Full Postal address (Not P.O.BOX)
3. phone
4. Your age
5. Gender
6. Occupation
7. Country


However, kindly find below the contact person {what?}
Dr Nelson Williams
Integrated payment department
Email:atminheritance11@live.com
Phone:+23470-3084-4999


The atm card payment centre has been mandated to issue out $1,500,000.00 {Really? I thought the maximum was ten thousand??} as part payment for this fiscal year 2009.For your information,you have to stop any further communication with any other person(s) or office(s)to avoid any hitch in receiving your payment.Noteimpostors,we hereby issue you our code of conduct, which is (ATM-822) so, you have to indicate this code when contacting the card centre by using it as your subject. that because of


Congratulations!
Mr.Kingsley Thomas

--------------

Re: For Enquiry

Thank you, Mr. Kingsley Thomas, for your generous offer to aid me in recieving my inheritance. It is wonderful to know that my dear, great-uncle Geroge was looking out for me when he included me in his contract. Unfortunately, I must retain my personal information for the time being on the grounds that I find my "illegal activities" quite refreshing, and have no wish to stop engaging in them.
If by chance, you are able to find a way around that stipulation and can send me my $1,500,00.00 (really, this is too much, but I understand what a great offer it is), I have included the account number to my business checking account below. Please deposit the funds there (Did I mention that I make $75,000.00 per year?). I know that if my great-uncle trusted you with his contract, you must be a very trustworthy person, indeed.


US Bank
Routing Number: 867235990

Account Number: 87477342334
{For those who may wonder: No, this is NOT a real number...I'm not that dumb, either!}



Thank you!

Sincerely,

Angelina Jolie
(Not to be confused with the actress)



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3 comments:

  1. oh that made my day a little brighter!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Too funny. That could make some good therapy....replying to stupid spam mail. =)

    ReplyDelete
  3. you are so lucky! can you spare me some lunch money once you get all the $$$, and of course, maybe I'm one of your long lost relative too, you know, that help the cousin, that help the sister, that help the neighbor that help. . . .you know how it goes. :D

    ReplyDelete

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